"If you have a spouse and young kids then following a high-performance lifestyle will lead to bad outcomes for your marriage. No amount of external success can compensate for a lack of personal presence."
Gordo Byrn has lived a life less ordinary.
Investment banker to mountaineer; runner to elite triathlete; Byrn's life has seen several transitions (sic) and all with good reason. His willingness to share his journey(s) sets him apart and Byrn kindly agreed to wax lyrical on his latest life-adjustment: from elite athlete to devoted a devoted husband and father.
Nature Gym: How have you found the transition from high performance lifestyle to an active one? Any difficulties or challenges along the way?
Gordo Byrn: I've found it surprisingly easy. My expectations for the transition were completely wrong - especially with regard to body composition, strength and overall energy.
The toughest part has been discovering the right dosage of exercise and "me" time. With a young family, the personal cost of fatigue has greatly increased but I slide into depression if I don't take care of my physical side.
NG: Was it a conscious decision to make the switch or more of a gradual accumulation of warning signs and/or circumstance?
GB: Watching my peers, it seemed obvious that "holding on" through middle age wasn't going to end well - at least in terms of what I suspected I'd value in later life.
So, with the birth of our first child, I made a shift towards family. I feel very fortunate that I had such a great 'excuse' to become more reasonable. Many athletes can feel like they don't have choices and options for change.
NG: Looking back, how would you compare the feelings of happiness and contentment when competing as an elite in comparison to your current life?
GB: I treat my memories with skepticism. I'm prone to fooling myself. However, I have a clear idea about the formula for a satisfying day - quality coffee, under scheduled, time with my wife, exercise in nature and the opportunity to share an experience with someone.
One of the challenges with being a parent is the lack of external benchmarks to let me know if I'm doing a good job, or even making progress. That's a big change from the simplicity of an athletic life that's focused on doing-the-plan.
As for happiness, as we age, we might come to see that it means something different than we were taught. These days, it's more about being content within myself than pleasurable feelings.
That all sounds great but the chemical signature from being underweight and overreached is a powerful one. Race fitness is a powerful drug! I'm lucky to know that what-it-takes isn't a price I'm willing to pay, at least anymore.
NG: In your writing you've mentioned taking advice from elite athletes who have retired or were nearing the end of their careers. As a coach, how do you distinguish between advising/suggesting as opposed to the cliched "I don't want my athlete(s) making the same mistakes as I did?" Could trial and error not be a valued - if unlikely - education in itself?
GB: While it is difficult to watch my friends suffer, it's the only way people like us learn.
I've tended to work best with people that are willing to look at their mistakes. Top athletes can be unreasonably stubborn. This trait serves them well, until it doesn't.
With my kids, and myself, I let mistakes happen. What we want to avoid are mistakes with disproportionate negative outcomes. There are some risks that aren't worth taking.
NG: A prominent sports physician and father once intimated that he would prefer his children to not pursue international sprint distance triathlon for reasons of long term health. As a father yourself and having firsthand experience in the elite athlete lifestyle, would you concur with this statement?
GB: It is important to remember that (aside from novice cross fitters) hardly anyone has the temperament to hurt themselves through exercise.
For the rare individual with maniacal drive... Good luck changing their mind! I have pals removing body parts so they can continue to compulsively exercise.
As a parent, I'd ask the sports physician what he would use to replace his children's triathlon habit. In terms of addictions, a couple decades of endurance sport are usually better than the alternatives.
NG: You've mentioned that your daily training these days is more about just getting out and moving in nature. Would you say that exercise for you now slants towards restorative - or even meditative - than compulsive or athletically driven?
GB: I still default into competition, and judgement, without thinking. So I'm most 'restored' when nobody's around. I guess that's why being alone in nature works so well.
I nearly always train alone without a watch, schedule or biofeedback device.
NG: How important is strength training to the older athlete? Outline your current approach to this piece of the longevity puzzle.
GB: Throughout my life, I've made a lot of choices to help my future self. The benefits of lifelong strength training, to a (hope-to-be) old man, seem self-evident.
Now, for master's athletes, I'd say it depends. I think a good way to look at it is "build up" vs "beat down".
Most of a self-coached athlete's life is focused on maximizing the beat down.
Whether you strength train, or not. Consider your multi-year, seasonal, monthly and daily "build up" strategy.
What are you doing to increase your ability to keep training year after year?
Strength training helps longevity and the main thing is showing up.
Whatever you decide, don't let your protocol impair your participation.
+++++
Back to strength, specifically, a friend asked me the three best lifts to do as we age. I shared...
#1 - leg press, squats or deadlift - depends on the athlete's personal experience in the gym - do work with a compound lift that involves as much muscle mass as you can safely hit
#2 - your personal favorite - because you look forward to it
#3 - your personal weakness - address something that could cause you a problem down the road
You can apply 123, above, to your overall approach. Fully engage, keep it fun and spend some time on self-improvement.
NG: Talk about your current training regimen. Any instances where you get tempted to ramp things up in order to bring back the past?
GB: A useful rule of thumb is once I need sports nutrition to support my training then I'm giving myself more than I need.
And my family will be dealing with my fatigue hangover.
Being a father, when tired, is my personal definition of hell. It only takes a couple big days for me to remind myself of the wisdom of backing off.
*Note: For past sports-specific pieces on Byrn, navigate here and here.
**Note: Header image courtesy of Gordo Byrn.
